June 1

So now we’re into June.  I never thought I’d still be here.  Today was [my brother] Mike’s birthday.  I should have called but I didn’t, oh well … I got my typing speed up to 37 wpm. It’s getting better slowly.  I’m still making lots of mistakes but at least I’m getting to practice … got my hair cut today too.  This guy does a pretty good job …

I glued a blanket to my floor with toothpaste yesterday.  The toothpaste is seeping through the blanket and now its stuck all over my socks.  But the room seems a little more cozy.  I’m going to stay in max for a while cause I’m comfortable here.

June 2

Just another day here.  It’s disappointing to be missing out on the summer.  I’m sure I’ll appreciate it more when I get out … My mother sent me a watch today.  She got a new one for me which was nice.  Sent some pictures of the kids too.  Other than that, it was just another day.

June 3

Nothing happened today.  Just another long, boring day.  I gotta get out of this place.

June 4

Ah, what can I say.  Time is getting so routine.  A got my typing speed up to 38 wpm.  I’m getting a wee bit faster every week.  I miss the internet.

. … if me and Jimmy get something going when I get out, and I think we will, I’m going to make lots of money.  That’s something to look forward to.  I got an offer I can’t refuse.  I tried to go straight but the system won’t let me.  So, fuck ‘em.  I’ll be worse than I ever was when I get out of here, whenever that is.

For now, I’m comfortable here in max.  We all get along well, although [Guard1] is going to take over Merles job here next week so I don’t know what will happen then …  I sent a letter to Herb Dickinson today to ask if he got my other letter.  I tried to call him, but they wouldn’t allow it, same as they wouldn’t let me call the RCMP yesterday, fucking bastards, infidels ….

June 7

I haven’t had much to write about these past few days.  It’s been so routine, boring.  Mum and dad were here to visit yesterday.  It was dad’s birthday.  I kinda wish they would visit less often cause I just don’t want to hear about the outside world.  My time is easier here when I don’t know about who is fucking me around.

… still just the three of us in the unit – me, Larry, and the newfie.  Everything’s alright … I’m getting to know Jimmy better.  I think he would trust me and we can do something when we get out.  I’ve put in a request to [Supervisor] about about applying to St. Eleanors House.  I expect that he’ll find some reason to turn me down, but I have to try.  If they’ll take me, I could be out the week of the 12th of July.  If not, then it will be the end of August.  That seems like a really long time now that the weather has gotten nice.  But what’s a guy to do?  Just sit and wait?

  … I heard that Jesse died of an overdose yesterday.  I think that this place ruined her.  She’s the second inmate to die of an overdose after leaving here so far this year. I think that says something about rehabilitation (lack of) here.  But nothing will change.  I’m sure of that.

June 8

Tuesdays gone (as Skynyrd would say).  Once we get past Monday, the days seem to go by quickly, until Saturday or Sunday.

I got a package from home today with some info about places to stay in Toronto.  It seems to be what I’m looking for …

[Supervisor] told me today he would talk to Brian S. about getting me into St. Eleanor’s House in July.  But he might not be so helpful when he receives, I mean reads, the letter I sent to the cops about my mail being tampered with.  At least it probably won’t happen anymore. Haha.

I also heard today that Lawrence MacAulay received my letter and personally gave it to the head guy at the RCMP.  So, there is some hope that I’ll get my money back.

I asked my father to call The Guardian or The Graphic and tell them that 2 people have overdosed shortly after being released from here so far this year and to tell them how resistant they are to my rehabilitation.  I really hope to see some sort of story about it in the paper this week or next.

June 9

This week is going by slowly.  32 more days till my hearing.  I gotta get out of here.  And if I do, I’d like to go see The Cranberries in Montreal at the end of August and get something set up while I’m there.

…  Rueben got sent to the hole again today, caught passing hash to one of the guys.  He’s such an idiot.

There’s not many of us left here now, just 6 in max.  Tomorrow, we get rid of the newfie so just me and Larry here.  That’s fine with me.  We only have 2 good chairs anyway …

June 10

[Guard1] took control of Max today, the new CO3.  He’s still as much an idiot as he ever was.  Tomorrow, he expects us to have our beds made by 9 a.m. so there might be a bunch of us going to the hole.  I’m certainly not going to make my bed for that pinhead.

… the other units got searched today but not ours.  It was because of a stupid comment that Rueben made that he got 2 ounces in.  What a stupid thing to say to a guard that was.  Nothing was found though, tomorrow, if I’m not in the hole, I’ll be going to the library to sort out some new books with Georgina.  Hopefully, I will get to go for pizza and pop for doing this.  That’s what I have to look forward to tomorrow.

June 11

This morning I helped to sort out some books at the library, a donation from Father Tingley.  We got a lot of good books in.  I was hoping to be allowed to go for pizza, but I didn’t hear anything about it this afternoon.

When I got back from the library, I found that [Guard1] had searched our unit.  He took some clothes, our games, and our Sunshine Girls.  And he told me to remove my carpet.  I haven’t done this and will not do it so I think we’ll have some sort of confrontation on Monday, and I probably won’t be in this unit any more …

I was pissed off at Larry this afternoon cause he was throwing the balls around when we were outside and hit me a couple times and so I stayed inside tonight.  They act like a bunch of kids out there …

This afternoon Jimmy and David were caught smoking hash in the unit, so they were sent to lockup.  Tomorrow we may all be in lockup because they put Carl M., child molester and most hated man in jail, in the left unit and so it is our duty to get rid of him.  If he is still here at lunchtime tomorrow, we are all going to give him a beating, it’s the right thing to do.  It shouldn’t have to come to this, but they have provoked the situation, and we will have to deal with it or be shunned by the population here. …

I sent a letter to Verna and [Supervisor] saying that we think [Guard1] is an idiot and not suited for this job.  I look forward to seeing their reaction to that.  I think all they can do is send me to medium.

… also today I reached 40 wpm and I sent a card and 11 skittles to Steven for his birthday.  I really wish I could be out for it but its beyond my control.

June 12

30 days till the panel … we didn’t get to beat the faggot today.  They kept him locked in the left unit, even at lunch, till three and then moved him out.  I suppose we saved ourselves a trip to the hole.  Some other time, I guess.  Probably Tuesday when [Guard1] gets back.

He was roaring at me this morning to remove my carpet or I would be charged.  I’m not going to move it, so I guess I’ll be charged.  Fuck him.  I’m going to put in a complaint Monday that he is harassing me.  I expect that I’ll end up in medium later this week, probably via the hole.  I do like it here, but a change would be good.  I would like to stay here and torture [Guard1] but I don’t think I’ll get the chance.

But me and Larry made a phone sex ad with a picture of his wife on it and he’s sure to blow up when he sees it.  Hope I’m here to see that.  I don’t think he’ll handle it well, the fucking pinhead … it’s really hot out this weekend.  Too bad we can’t get out more.