February 8

Fucked up the computer this morning.  Nothing too serious.  I deleted the File Manager icon, and nobody knows how to get it back.  “New” computers coming tomorrow so whoever sets them up should know what to do.

Heard today that there’s some pills coming in.  I’m feeling kinda uncomfortable about this.  I want to get high, but I don’t want to get caught, of course.  My parole is at risk.  I’m considering refusing a piss test, but I don’t know what the consequences of that would be.

Drug course still boring but I’m getting through it.  Went to church tonight.  Ron Y. was there and told me he’d try to bring some books to the library for me.  I’m glad I went if only for that. Got to see Tyler, John, and Rob there.  Rob lost his parole over the crib board incident.  I suppose it didn’t look good since he had just completed an Anger Management course.  His new release date is one day before mine.  I imagine we’ll be getting all fucked up then.  And I look forward to it.

February 9

Not much of a day.  Totally fucking boring.  I gotta get outa here.  Heard that Art and Cindy had a boy, so I am an uncle again.

I came up with an idea so they’ll give me a piss test.  I got Doug to write an anonymous note saying that he thinks I’m using drugs.  And tomorrow, I’ll slip it out by the office.  Hope it works.  I’ll have a fun weekend if it does.

February 11

I was kinda sick yesterday, some sort of flu I guess, but it’s better today.  Although by times, I’m very sick of this place.  At night, I don’t mind it here but the evenings and sometimes the afternoons are so long.

I’m an uncle again.  [My middle brother] and [his wife] had their kid Monday.  They called him Alexander Vitalus, a good MacDonald name.  I’d like it if [my wife] would bring my own kids in.  Somehow, I think maybe she would be happy if [my daughter] didn’t even know me when I got out of here.  I don’t understand at all why she’s like that.

I was hoping to get a piss test this morning, but it didn’t happen. Now my weekend is fucked up cause I can’t get fucked up.

We got five more people in here today. It was just getting cleared out to a comfortable level and now it’s full again.  I regret coming to minimum.  Leonard spoke at the meeting last night.  His story was very interesting.  I liked hearing it.

Tomorrow, I think they’re coming in to fix my window.  That should be a pain in the arse.  I hope it’s not in the morning.  And another long weekend begins tomorrow.  Tonight I pray that I have a piss test tomorrow morning.