mereggie stories

more writing & related stuff


reg's jail journals ... Sleepy Hollow Correctional Centre

Day 9 (November 5)

Today is the ninth of my originally scheduled ten days here.  Hopefully, but not likely, it will be my last.  I await the arrival of my lawyer for her opinion.

My approach to this situation, tomorrow in court, would be to meet with Dr. Jones and discuss what happened both here and at Homewood, and have her speak in court or write a letter to the court.  That is unlikely to happen tomorrow as there is not much time left.  I would also hope that a staff member from the house, possibly Freddie, could write a letter describing the progress I have made in treatment.  I would also like to have a letter from Martin Darrell stating that he sees promise in my writing (though I’m worried that I may have sounded desperate when I wrote him).

At this point it seems very unlikely that all of this could possibly come together by tomorrow.  Perhaps if my lawyer had come to see me sooner (I have been calling her since last Wednesday) it could have been arranged.  The most likely option is that it will be adjourned to a later date, hopefully within two weeks, and I will be remanded till then, probably in custody here.  I wish I had at least been able to discuss the possibility of being released to my parents custody until sentencing.  Actually, I don’t really want to stay with my parents but that’s the only option if I were released.  I would like to be able to see my kids in Souris but the idea of living with my father makes me uncomfortable.  He seems to be continually analyzing and judging me, not for what I am doing right but for what I am doing wrong.  That’s how its always been and I suspect it will never change.

Today has been a really slow day, most of it spent waiting for the lawyer, who never arrived.  She did call around 5:00 so we will meet at the courthouse tomorrow morning.  She was talking to Dr. Jones who says that Addictions P.E.I. has done all they can for me.  I will have to see her myself and explain what happened.  A bit of what it was like, what happened, and what its like now.

Andre ask me tonight if I was on Paxil.  He thought I was getting ‘buggy’.  I am on a high dose of it and I would like to get ir reduced as I am not at all depressed now.  Well … except for today.

Tomorrow, I must get up at 7 to prepare to leave at 8 for court.

Day 10, November 6, 1998.